11
in

Love ItLove It

Wander project what dad saw…

It is funny; I know my children have expressed the sadness of knowing I was gone. I was, for more than ten years gone often. I don’t often tell them, that I understood that pain. My father was gone often and back when he was traveling the world; he was gone for far longer. Three months at a time are often wandering places that needed help setting up a science education program. South Africa, Saudia Arabia, Pakistan. Thailand, Malaysia all countries visited. Although I don’t think dad visited Malaysia other than to visit a friend of the family, actually the others were the ones he went to and was gone for extended periods. I understood the frustration the kids expressed, rarely but from time to time.

You learn quickly when you are out of your land, that the world is different. I made it a point of always calling home at least once a day.  At times those calls were more of a lifeline for me, than a conversation. At times they were a life-line for my wife, a moment she could get away from full-time parenting and be part of a partnership. I would say some of those calls were fun when I had to be the bad guy from 12000 miles away. The most important lesson I learned as an elementary school teacher was the need for consistency in discipline. That you have to be the same across the board, variance causes dissent. Dissent causes people to see the world differently.

So be consistent, apply the same rules at all times.

But 12000 miles away the impact is lessened. In that case, you have to be a backup, not the actual threat. Althgouh I do recall “wait until your father gets home.”  It is hard when you travel. Looking back the best decision I ever made was moving on, no longer traveling and settling in to view the world from the same place every day. Yes, it can be frustrating to drive an hour one way. But that doesn’t matter if you can be home for dinner every night.

I don’t miss flying either.

What do you think?

13 points
Legend

Written by DocAndersen

I am a long time blogger and technology poster.I focus on what is possible, but I also try to see what is coming. In recent years I have been focused on sharing the memories of my family, as part of my Family History Project.

11 Comments

Leave a Reply
  1. In the meadows, it smells of beautiful fresh grass. As a child, I really loved playing there. The bird I saw was a white heron. And the other animal crocodile, alligator or whatever his name is, I do not want to meet him.

  2. Was the croc a traveling partner. Great photos. You love traveling about and so did your father but you know I rather like to stay put and not travel too much and certainly not alone. I can tell you that I had the oddest feeling when I returned to the US. First of all, there was all this heartache, I had to worry about my cat who had no idea where we were going and then after 20* years in Latvia except for several times visiting the states I saw on the airline map we were leaving the European continent. It then hit me I was completely changing my life. By the time the map showed we were entering US territory I was singing Hello, America how are you…

    • We, when I was little moved from Indiana to Bangkok Thailand. I know the feeling you had leaving one life for another.

      It takes courage to make changes that big. I know when we came back to the US, I was actually singing Back home again, in Indiana!

  3. It was sometimes much more difficult than it is today. Today we have much more modern communication technology (computer, mobile phone …). I understand children who miss their father. Children do not understand why dad’s not so much time.

Leave a Reply