Andre Hartslief
All the time we’re caught in a loop of constant internal chatter and judgment that never abates, a little voice telling us that we’re stupid or lazy or plumb not good enough. You wouldn’t even notice the degree to which you believe it or are drained by it, you’ll just be spending your entire day working to overcome the stresses and strains, trying to just live your life and at various points facing the resignation that if you can’t get your ass off this damned wheel maybe you are never going to get to where you want in life – may be that happiness you’re after or that weight you want to lose or that career or relationship you crave will remain just out of reach.
This article is dedicated to those that experience that self-defeating monolog-the endless stream of subterfuge and doubt that taints and limits everyday life. This is a conversational slap from the universe to wake you up to your true potential, to unscrew yourself and get spectacularly into your life. Let’s get this thing started in the right place.
There are two kinds of talk you engage in every day: talking to others and talking to yourself. You might be one of those that insists, “I don’t talk to myself!” But, in fact, most of the conversations you have on any given day are with yourself- all “enjoyed” in the solitude and privacy of your own head. Whether you’re introverted or extroverted, creative or practical, you spend gigantic slabs of your time talking to…YOU!
You do it while exercising, working, eating, reading, writing, walking, texting, crying, arguing, negotiating, planning, praying, meditating, making love, (to yourself or to others) you name it. And yes, you even do it in your sleep. You are actually doing it right now! Don’t worry, it doesn’t mean you’re nuts. Or perhaps it means we’re all a little crazy.
Either way, we all do it, so settle down and welcome to the freak show. Studies show that we have over fifty thousand thoughts per day. Think of all the things you say to yourself that you’d rather not or that you try to overcome or defeat. While we have little or no say in those automatic and reactionary thoughts, we have a huge say in which of those same thoughts we attach significance to. They don’t come pre-loaded!
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So, do you talk to yourself?
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Yes
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No
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My whole life is one detour after another.
I talk to myself out loud to get answers to things bothering me so want to run it by myself out loud to see how it sounds. I have had people tell me I am no good or will not amount to myself. At times I believed them and at other times I knew they were wrong and did not know me and just wanted to be nasty or mean to me.
What an incredible idea! Ask any actor whether it is even possible to do repetition without hearing what the words actually sound like. You have one life, Hannihar, and none of it is dependent on someone else’s say-so. If you don’t really believe God made no mistake, creating you, you can honestly not expect someone else to see more in you. You are the best most loyal person you know, right? Everyone else will leave you.
Of course, I talk to myself otherwise when I don’t go out I would not hear a human voice for a very long time except when I listen to my music then I sing along. I also sing to the country rat in the cubby hole in my kitchen. I call him Rattigan and I give him scraps of food and then sing to him Rattigan your getting fat again but I don’t look at it as going nuts I look at it as making my life more interesting.
This was so moving I was totally stunned! More so because I know you are a very serious person. I actually went away from this post to think about my answer to you. I would like to share this little story with you, while I was in the hospital with an eventual leg amputation, I was in tremendous physical pain.
The hospital episode clashed with a once in a lifetime opportunity to visit my Daughter and son-in-law and new-born grandchild(only grandchild) in Ireland. I decided that my wife should go so that at least one of us could see her. I’m not telling you this because I’m such a great guy, I mention this for another reason. Staying behind and in such pain, I felt so sorry for myself until one evening at a particularly low point in my life, I dragged the wheelchair closer using a fellow patient’s crutches. I set off down the huge general ward and stopped at every bed asking how the patient was doing, offered some encouragement, etc as a result, I had to fetch a few bed-pans, peel a few oranges, tuck in a blanket here, pour a glass of water there and wipe a brow or two.
The amazing thing I noticed, was that my own mental anguish and even some physical pain soon abated. After that, my low points became highlights.
Sandra, you’re such a nice person, It is a pity you aren’t able to share your caring spirit with others like in a hospice or clinic, it is so therapeutic and rewarding. Perhaps, you are already doing it through your poetry and books you write. 🙂
My Dad always said, I talk to myself, I have to have an intelligent conversation every now and then. 🙂 Seriously, I do talk to myself and that is ok!
Lots of times no one else will listen. I have to talk it over with me.
Good point, it works for me!
Of course, it is Carol I did some serious research for this post and it’s perfectly true, we all have more conversations with ourselves than with any other person. In fact, you are your closest friend who will never leave. If you have acknowledged the spirit-you, (sub-conscious) you will not spend eternity with a stranger…
Who was it who said that they talk to themselves because they enjoy lively wit and appreciate a good listener?
I have no idea and it made me smile.
Mmm! I believe I heard it said recently too, though, the name evades me right now…Lol.
I try my best not to do it here and in writing though! Sometimes I am successful.
You’ll have to show me how. My mind charges ahead like a freight train, which is fine as long as the route is scheduled and controlled by me, ie stopping at stations for cargo and passenger movement. Lol
Detours are where all the action happens. Enjoy them!
Boy am I glad at times, like, right now, people can’t read my thoughts…?
Sounds like you have had a few detours, I’m a Virgo, I boringly stick to the schedule.