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People who change us

What I would have been if we hadn’t met: lazy, self-satisfied, or maybe irritable and angry that the world is too harsh, foreign to me. And I would be spending time alone in the dark bar, hiding from the fact that time is running too fast. I could still run in the squirrel’s circle – I’ve tried it already – have more, shine brighter, and in the end, I would fall into the grave pit with all those fake gold clothes.

I imagine the catwalk stars returning home after a fashion show – no brand dresses, no plastic wings – take off the sweaty socks, have no longer strength for taking shower,  and unable to fall asleep – empty thoughts continue to swing in the head like disc’s ball – does not glow, only glitter spills on the walls.

I know how the office workers come back from work – they fall asleep on the couch with a piece of pizza during the fifth part of the series, monitoring colorful lives of strangers, and at night dreaming about holidays that are so far away and always too short.

I myself have been such and could be such many times – to look forward to brighter days, a warmer summer, a hotter love adventure – and probably not get it finally.

………………………

But we met.

You took me by the hand, and I slowly dared to experience life – stronger, more sensitive, more painful, sweeter. Traveling with you in small steps, I saw much more of the world than before – flying by airplanes, trains, and freeways. Standing next to you, I felt more significant than when got the awards from my studies and then work.

Living with you, I no longer dream of vacation – all days look good for me. And the Earth is not so hard, and the stars are no longer so cold.

Today I know that the years we spent together are the most beautiful I have ever experienced. And not because you were something special – it’s me became different.

It is fortunate for me to find you in my heart.

© Fortune, 2009

  • Is there a person in your life who makes you change?

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13 Comments

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  1. Interesting idea this, if others can change us.

    Can anyone really ever change us, or can only we do that, so, perhaps only ourselves can change ourselves?

    Where is the truth here?

    I would answer that truth changes all it touches, so hearing truth from any source, from any other will change you, if you accept the change, and are ready to embrace it, as a part of yourself.

    If you are not ready to change, or do not want to be changed by others changing you, as you reckon, you are perfect as you are, you will never change yourself from this position, until you drop this illusionary cover of perfection.

    • I deeply believe there are no perfect humans on our earth. You are right, in general, we change ourselves, not someone changes us but it happens because of the influence of someone or if we want to because we are not satisfied with who we are. No one stays the same all the life. We all change, some for good, others for bad.

      • I would agree that nobody stays the same all their life.

        Even physically, they are changing constantly, and yet, at some levels, they can refuse to change their beliefs about someone else, for example.

        A sister that refuses to speak to a brother, for example, over a period of 40 years, and has never many any attempt to change this attitude with him, will probably die unchanged in that attitude too.

        She has not changed in this either for good, or bad, but has stayed steadfast in her fixed position. You could say indirectly though, that the situation has changed for the bad, I suppose, as the effect on the brother magnifies overtime.

  2. My late husband was my voice of sanity and so many other things and when he passed on I really got scared for real thinking how in the world will I go on but I have managed and a great deal of how I have done this and still do is that I think to myself now what would he have advised me in such and such a situation and it really has been a great help

    • If honestly, I am scared to imagine the day I could stay without my partner of life. I know that I am strong enough to continue my life without him but I do not want to… We both sometimes talk about how perfectly it would be to die at the same moment…
      You are a happy woman because you met someone who was your true soulmate.

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