Today, my assistant at the coffee cup suddenly said that after 10 years of marriage, feelings got cold. With her husband, they are sleeping turning backs to each other, while years ago, they slept intertwined by legs and hands. That’s the situation when there is not much to say because you do not know the details of strangers’ lives.
But as it usually is, some women’s chat we still had. I asked her, does she remember the first time she did not feel the earth under her feet when he kissed her? When her head was dizzy, the whole giant world fitted in a gentle touch of lips, and it seemed the death now would be sweet too.
You have repeatedly tried to repeat this. Sometimes it succeeded, but every time weaker until that feeling disappeared. You are again afraid of death. You wake up before dawn, listening to the breath, yours and his, in silence, feeling alone like never before. Again you are looking for passion and forgetfulness, but you felt sadder and sadder losing confidence in yourself, in your inner attraction.
Because you forgot the first kiss. When your lips were so close to your beloved that you felt his darkness, light, heaven, and hell, and you knew, you are no longer alone at this moment. Such a kiss requires more confidence in one another than just a stormy sex night. But if without trust – what is love then? Only hot ashes. Let kisses bring us back together.
I have heard such a description many times from the women I met in my life and listening to them I feel how a similar fear rises in me too. What if such a day will come to my life too? But after a minute of weakness, I again believe that everything is in my hands.
© Fortune, 2009
Does your first kiss still has importance to you?