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Are Compliments Beneficial?

Seems like the answer to this question would be obvious, right? So it’s difficult to understand  negativity and cynicism, isn’t it? Maybe we are not as tuned in to the answer for this post’s title as we think.

January 24 is National Compliment Day, which is a very nice thing, but how lovely it is to extend the concept throughout all the days of our lives! One of the most delightful things about compliments is that they enhance the lives of both the giver and the receiver.

Building ourselves into more of what we want to be by building up others begins with being generous with affirming compliments whenever possible. Making it a point to commend others, to find ways to applaud their work and/or to encourage them regarding other aspects of their lives is good for everyone.

The single most important rule for successful compliments, though, is that they must be sincere. In fact, this primary rule is so pivotal that there are two unchangeable rules regarding insincere compliments.

What is the first of the two? An insincere compliment is always detectable (even if the recipient does not initially realize the insincerity). The other rule is that instead of having a beneficial effect on the one doing the supposed complimenting there is a measurable detrimental effect on their own mental/emotional well-being as well as their standing with others.

No one trusts and insincere person, and we are warned against trusting flatterers, so coming across as one is something to be careful about, but being truly gracious and kind is something others know when they see it. When they see it, they see a someone who stands tall above the average person. Sincerity allows us to build trusting relationships.

A quote I read long ago ended with “…you will never be sorry you were kind.” Read more about everyday kindness to ponder ways of strengthening others’ lives.

  • Do you consciously practice finding ways to give sincere compliments?

    • Yes
    • No
  • Do you look for ways to go above and beyond in being kind to people?

    • Yes
    • No
  • Have you initiated discussions on the importance of sincere compliments and going out of the way to extend kindnesses?

    • Yes
    • No

What do you think?

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Written by robertatalloni

Thankful to know that life is less about where I've been and more about where I'm going... John 10:10

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15 Comments

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    • That’s a good point. I’ve not recognized the suspiciousness, but many really are insecure and do not know how to respond to compliments. Sometimes it simply because they did not learn it as a child, but other cases are true insecurity playing out in some fashion. Appreciate that you added your note here!

  1. Once here I tried to show the difference between a thoughtful and helpful comment and compliments and just saying something to earn a “v”. There is nothing wrong with either and they are very different things. Most of my compliments I send in compliments and leave on comments. I cannot remember why I decided to do it that way. I am going to look back in my journal and see!

    Thanks for making me think.

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