August 18th Accountability

Yesterday was an interesting day and by the time I got home I was exhausted and probably a little hostile. I am not great at bouncing back after an incident has occurs.  I need a time out to stop and think about things. 

We had a great time, and I had been up and down cement stairs all day and my legs were hurting. I could barely walk. We stopped at the gas station and I asked if he could go in and get me something to drink so I could take my medication. I got out of the car and started gassing up and he said “I will finish this, you just go in.”

I didn’t argue, in fact I didn’t say a word. I simply  got back in the car.  He finished gassing up and we started off to home. “Why didn’t you go get a drink?” 

“Because my legs hurt so bad I can barely walk. You had to help me to the car, remember.”

“Why is everything my fault?”

I didn’t respond.  The traffic was extreme. We didn’t get home for four hours and it’s usually about an hour and twenty minutes. There was not a word spoken all the way home.

When I got home and got out of the car, my leg couldn’t handle it and I went down. He went in the house. After about 20 minutes I was able to get up. I called my physical therapist on my cell and he came over. He worked me over in the front yard and got me into the house and of course said ice and then bed. Which I did.

There is no right or wrong. It was simply an unfortunate experience. He thought he was helping by standing at the gas pump and I thought he was mean because he wouldn’t get me something to drink to take medication.

This morning he said “You stayed in the guest room.”

“Ed, came over and worked on my leg and told me I needed to ice. The ice bag is upstairs, so I got it from the freezer and went to the closest bed.”

“You could have come downstairs and told me. I was not avoiding you, I was avoiding the stairs.”

His response “whatever”. He looked at my leg. “That looks really bad, does it still hurt?”

“Yes, I will go to physical therapy after work.”

“I hope you don’t expect me to go. I have things to do.”

“Nope, don’t expect anything.”

Now that I got that off my chest. I will go put dinner in the slow cooker so they will have something to eat.

I didn’t lose my patience. I didn’t yell or scream I am counting that as patient.