Check yourself!

One of my mother’s friends sends me and I believe many others a New Year’s Letter every year. I was afraid that when Mom passed away I would be removed from the list, but that didn’t happen. (That was many years ago.) She is at least 91 now and the letter still came. Typically it has a cute little story and some wisdom. Sometimes they are repeats with a twist, and we still enjoy them. This year it was a very different letter and I enjoyed it as well. I called and asked if I could share some of her wisdom. Her reaction was not what I expected at all. 

“Did you really read it?” she quietly asked.

“Of course, I read it. I read it every year and then I put them in my journal.”

She cried, “I have been writing these for a long time and often get a thank you card that says “thanks for the note or card”. Rarely does anyone confirm that they actually read what I wrote. You can share it anyway and anywhere you want, just don’t use my name. I hear people are always trying to scam old ladies.”

“I would bet my last dollar that sometime in your life you have heard “if only these walls could talk” or “wouldn’t you like to be a fly on the wall.  Well this year I took few minutes and really thought about that and how it might apply in my life. 

I made a list of behaviors that I have that I am not particularly proud of. Then I wrote the list again and but “she” as the pronoun.  I then proceeded to give her the advice and all my wisdom about the changes “she” needed to make. I was my own fly and I was the walls in my home. I cried some real tears as I realized how much “I” had clinged to instead of solved and released. (There are a few things that need to stay.)

One of my friends dropped by and we read the list. A week later she went my a list with my name (not she) and all the things she saw as the fly on the wall or the walls in my home. We are better friends having done this together and quite by accident really. 

Serendipity. It is one of my favorite words”