Suddenly I am having second thoughts about where I belong and who I am. It seems like an odd time to worry about something like this, but I am. Clearly I don’t have decades to live, it’s more like months or years and wow what really needs to be completed. I am starting to feel very uncomfortable. Has anything I have done up to this point here or anywhere else made a difference? Have I really done any good? Do the goals really matter and if I disappeared tomorrow would anyone outside of the two peole who live in my house even realize that I was gone.
I guess work would notice, but I am remote and they would probably just disengage.
I suppose I have some serious thinking to do, right now. All of the sudden the walls are closing in and I am feeling trapped and undone. (Maybe this is what panic feels like.)
Do I just stop?