I am going to take the time I need to grieve. I lost another family member today. In the midst of all of this, I need comfort. I am alone here. My other family members are over 400 miles away. I have looked up the stages of grief. I have to go to work so that should keep my mind occupied. I am bounced back and forth here because I am so grateful to so many of you for the happiness, kindness and advice you have offered me. The only time I have felt the need to leave is when I have felt attacked. I hope that never happens to me or anyone else here. The damage to the soul is real and I don’t know if it will ever really heal. It seems to me that when I need the most support the most anger is shown. There is no real protection so somehow I need to learn to deal with things.
The good news is that my father’s headstone is set next to my Mom’s. The sad news is that today we lost a child. She never got to walk. She never got to talk. She sure knew how to smile and we will miss that smile. I sure hope she is with the family that has passed on and is being comforted and at peace.
I do believe our spirits live on and still it’s so hard to say goodbye. I think I am sitting here at stage one and it’s probably time to take some medication and get some sleep before it’s time to get up and work.
Please take time today to tell the ones you love how important they are to you.