“Those that know, do. Those that understand, teach.” ~Aristotle
I’ve been mostly introverted for most of my younger life, often avoiding issues that could cause a damaging conversation between me and another person.
Experience has taught me that when I get upset, I rarely handle my hardship with grace.
I worked as a restaurant manager in my late father’s restaurant for some years after school, and it was just too easy to react to the frustration I felt when an employee disregarded my request that they stock the bathroom with paper towels or wash the front windows.
I would either explode or I would remain silent. I couldn’t figure out how to simply approach the person and work through the issue. And as the restaurant is a fast-paced environment, there was no time to process these dysfunctional circumstances.
But as life naturally works out, I found myself unemployed for a small stint, before becoming a cop, whereupon I had the chance to muse over the past and discover the reasons my voice wasn’t being heard and understood.
And we all want to be understood. Maybe you relate to my experience in that, no matter how hard you try, no one gets it. Then we make efforts to force people to appreciate us, defending our case over and over, which can create negativity and make the situation more incomprehensible. Well, it took a while for me to figure out that my deep resentment stemmed from working long hours with very little free time. I read many books on the topic because it eventually dawned on me, that circumstances come up in anyone’s life and have the power if left unchecked, to distort one’s view of the world and even more so in one’s own life.
Here are a few dog-eared pages of notes I came across in an ancient notepad of mine. Although the paper is old, the content is fresh and relevant.
A Few Ways To Be Kind And Still Get Your Point Across:
* Understand that your anger is a normal reaction. …* Do not express your view until you feel calm and comfortable. …* Set the goal of helping others. …* Relate to the opinions of others. …* Don’t fight. …* Try not to take things personally.
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