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A Collection of Clerihews

The clerihew is a simple and pithy type of poem that says something about a person, whose name is always the first line. Here is a collection that I have written – some of them several years ago:

Queen Elizabeth the FirstWas by no means the worstIt was best to be waryOf her sister Queen MaryQueen VictoriaWent to a trattoriaAlbert sat down and snoozedShe wasn’t amusedJeremy CorbynFound it absorbin’To take copious notesWhen campaigning for votesTheresa MayWas discovered one dayIn search of an exitOther than BrexitNigel FarageWent to his garageHis car was resplendentAnd, of course, independentSam AllardyceDoes not need asking twiceHe’ll declare black is whiteIf the money is rightWilliam the SecondWas generally reckonedA total disgraceAs well as red in the faceEdmund Clerihew BentleyAlways did things gentlyWhen it came to writing verseHe was never less than terseMargaret Thatcher?No-one could catch herAs everyone would learnShe was not one to turnAnthony SherDid not star in Ben HurHis talents shone clearIn his Stratford King LearGeneral George GorringeWas eating an orangeTo celebrate the timeHe provided a rhymeDonald J TrumpWas given a thumpHis chances are shrinkingOr is this wishful thinking?Hillary ClintonWas putting a tint onWhen seeking votes, east or westIt’s always good to look your bestWilliam ShakespeareOften makes appearFor me, lots and lotsOf ideas for good plotsCharles John Huffam DickensThe plot often thickensIn Bleak House there’s thick mistBut not in Oliver TwistGeoffrey ChaucerDrank from a saucerAs did most of the malesIn his Canterbury TalesKing Richard the ThirdMight have thought it absurdThat his bones would long festerNeath a car park in LeicesterPercy Bysshe ShelleyWas putting on a wellyWhen out popped a toad –But it didn’t get an odeEmperor NeroWas never a heroHe wrote many a Latin idyllBut he never played the fiddleEmperor CommodusNever kept the job in focusHe thought himself a doughty fighterInstead? A nasty little blighterAlistair McGowanHas audiences wowin’Footy’s his obsessionBut he makes a good impression

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