jaylar
One should note, the ego of an Abuser is that of the psychopath or narcissist; for that is what they are.
The Abuser may not be a serial killer, may not have any attribute which one could select that would indicate they have anything to be proud of to encourage their narcissism.
This does not change their nature.
An Abuser sees the world the same way as the serial killer.
The fact a particular Abuser never got to kill anyone, never got the power to become a Boss From Hell, is a minor feature. It is like being lacto-intolerant but never consuming dairy products.
The ‘genes’ are there, they just have not been tested.
Once one catches the fact that the Abuser has no empathy, does not see other people are equal… in fact, they could be card board cut outs, one knows how to adjust.
Sadly I have been in contact with such people. A family member is a narcissist and nobody wants to acknowledge his behavior. They just accept it and say, oh that is just how he is. I can’t accept such behavior. There is no room for it in my life.
I take it like a ‘tell’. Like when this guy is bluffing, he puffs his cheeks. So I know.
I ran into a narcissit the other day and did I have fun! Because I know the signs, here’s what I did. He was talking, someone called to me, and I turned to greet them. Insulted, my narcissist walked away. Alas.