In the previous article I touched upon the ability of the Abuser to control the Victims to the extent of having them perform complicated unpaid tasks.
What makes the task more complicated is the withholding of necessary facts.
For example, if the Victim is a lawyer, the Abuser will demand legal expertise, but deliberately withhold crucial information.
This is because although the Abuser needs help the point of the exercise is not to gain it. The point is to get the Victim to perform unpaid tasks which, due to the lack of information, must be unsuccessful.
It is vital that Victims and Ex-Victims fully grasp that the Abuser’s pleasure is not in gaining money or property or power. The Abuser’s pleasure is in having the Victim perform unpaid work which must fail.
Understand that for the Victim to succeed in the task, even where the Abuser gains $$ is a failure for the Abuser.
Making the Victim fail, is the success.
Victims will always express shock and disbelief that an Abuser would deliberately withhold necessary facts so that the person helping him will fail. The Abuser will be the one to lose benefits. Gaining benefits is not important to the Abuser, making his Victim fail is.
This is why many Abusers will abuse themselves. It is to prevent the Victim from succeeding.