My Sister, Miri had married a man called Harvey, about whom we knew nothing. We never heard of him, saw him, until the wedding. He was a rather unattractive older man, who isolated himself.
My husband had tried to ‘befriend’ him. To describe Harvey is to recount his actions.
When we would arrive at the house, Miri would open the door. We did not see Harvey. He did not get up to greet us. He stayed in his ‘man cave’.
The first time this happened, Alan, thinking that maybe Harvey was in the midst of an important sports event, or unaware we had arrived went to the ‘man cave’.
According to Alan, Harvey didn’t even look at him, keeping his eyes on the television where a minor match was happening. Alan spoke to Harvey, who didn’t answer.
Alan sat another minute or so, then ‘isolated’ Harvey. What he would do is, when we came to visit, he’d say hi, then take the kids outside to play.
At first it was just Alan and my kids, for Miri could not let go of Lynn. Then, when Peter was born, Lynn was outside with my children. Sometimes he’d take them all of ice cream or on a walk.
Now that Mark had been born, and Peter relegated he joined them. His connection my husband was powerful. Apparently, Harvey took no interest in the children. Alan became a kind of father to him.
As the years passed, we could see the effect Miri’s neglect had on the children; but realised that Harvey ignored all of them.
Miri and Peter had once had a mother, now they had no one except us.
We knew ‘something would happen’. The neglect Miri showed to Lynn and now Peter was unbelievable. It was as if they had done something and were being punished.