Once you get away from an abusive partner you have to analyse the relationship (After Abuse). This is important so that you feel no guilt or responsibility..
It could take a while; maybe years, but you have to analyse it so that you never make the same mistake.
You will never make it again if you realise what happened, how it happened, and see the patterns.
With an adulterous partner you have to realise this is a person who will have sex with anyone. It is not your fault. Do not take it as judgement.
I can tell you of a case where an average guy married a beauty queen who had money and a wonderful personality. He cheated on her with a gal with two left feet who had some low level job and was as sour as a lime.
The point is; an abusive man abuses everyone he can; as long as they can’t fight back, he will abuse them. An adulterer will have sex with any female who is available.
Once you get this, the rest is easy.