It is vital to overcome fear. It is vital that you do what you are ‘afraid’ of so that you are no longer afraid.
When you leave the Abuser and ‘never look back’ you hold that fear forever. When you can develop as near a ‘normal’ relationship with this person, you lose the fear.
You will feel younger, stronger, smarter, more successful when, after a time of ‘quarantine’ you can do an email exchange. You can run into this person in public and have no palpitations.
This is not a forgiveness or peace issue this is for you to get through the situation feeling in control and powerful.
When the EX is a cheater you have a bit better ‘control’ because you know he’ll jump anything with a skirt so it doesn’t bother you.
You know that he can’t be relied on. You KNOW he can not be faithful. So, you never rely on him.
Imagine he says he’ll send you something. You KNOW he can’t be relied on. You KNOW that if he was bringing you a birthday cake, and some gal asked him for a slice, he’d forget about you. So You Don’t rely on him.
He says he will, you make alternative plans, and when he ‘lets you down’, a big smile explodes on your face, because you KNEW he would.
That is the ‘POWER’ you get when you properly analyse a previous relationship, when you confront your fears and sorrows.
You need to confirm your confidence. And this is how you do it.