One has to ‘test’ the assumption a person is an abuser. One does not want to daub a perfectly decent person as an Abuser.
The person who never tells you where you are going, might just be surprising you. But, it also could be an exercise of control.
You disturb the pattern, just a little, not with antagonism, not with a long speech, but by ‘inadvertently’ setting a conflicting venue.
If he is disappointed, perhaps had purchased tickets to some place you would like to go, but will comply with your choice, well, you can change your mind and go with him.
If he is angry and either refuses to go with you or comes and tries to spoil it, you know he’s an Abuser. End of relationship.