Deep Thoughts: Christmas Edition

Photos courtesy of Everything Christmas.

As I search for the answers to deep philosophical questions, I ponder the reasons why things are the way they are.  I ponder this as I listen to Christmas songs, in the cold evening air, as I sit, and breathe in all this holiday spirit in me……

If you can see your neighbors’ Christmas tree from the street, does that make you a peeping Christian?

If you broke up with your girlfriend and she comes back to you, does that make this Christmas a Return of the Macaroni holiday story? (‘Cause she’s your only love…)

If your GPS doesn’t work, and you can’t send him/her your location, will you focus on communication?

If Julia Roberts gets a cold this winter, will she have plenty of tissues, or plenty of issues?

If your co-worker Dale collects all the money for the Secret Santa office party, does that make him a Chip n’ Dale?

If a guy watches the Miss Universe Pageant, does that make him a promiscuous boy?

And finally, if you don’t buy your kids marbles for Christmas, are you a Home Alone wrecker?

I must keep searching for answers.