DocAndersen
The internet is full of negativity now. So much negativity. It reminds me of that adage “the child that cries wolf.” First, I made the conversation gender neutral, that is important. Second I want to expand on the reality of the actual story. The story or legend is that the child cried wolf a couple of times when there was no wolf and then when there was a wolf nobody came. As someone that has built and share applications with the world, I can tell you that the applicability of remembering the human is beyond critical. First, the person you are complaining about is a human. They, like you, want to get some positive feedback, something nice said to and about them. It behooves us as people to make sure we share both positive and negative.
As I said, the internet had become a hide behind my screen cesspool. People that I am sure, if you asked them, would say “I am a positive person.” On the internet actually, spend negative capital like there is no consequence. But, there is a consequence. First, it has to be honest. One of the reasons that I don’t carry on twitter conversations is the sheer number of lies now on twitter. But I do share things on Twitter. I counted over the weekend; I shared 120 tweets between Saturday and Sunday. All of the tweets I shared were simply positive connections to my blog, podcast or things my wife is selling on eBay. I also retweeted (and I counted those in the 120) several pictures of animals that I found cute. I liked those pictures and sent a DM to a couple of folks about how cool the pictures were.
I posted two-poems over the weekend. They are not always that I’ve created, but I share them because well over the years I’ve written so many of them. I get a lot of positive compliments about the poetry, so I keep sharing. I realized when I consider the platform Virily, where I post most often, I get ten positive comments to every one questionable comment. I get 40 or more positive comments to every negative comment I get. As a school teacher early in my career I remember my first mentor saying “if you want kids to change, the positive has to outweigh the negative 5 to 1.” I stuck to that, later moving into IT and IT training. The owner of the first training facility I worked for always said: “Adults needed twice the positive” when we talked about getting adults to change their behavior.
What positive things have you said about Virily today?
- Photos upload much faster in Gallery Mode.
- You can comment on comments in gallery mode per picture (you couldn’t for the longest time)
- The number of positive comments on my posts Saturday, Sunday and today nine positive 0 negative. Virility has built a wonderfully supportive community!
Thanks!
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Question of
Have you taken the time to count the number of negative comments you make online?
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Yes
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No
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Question of
Do you always remember the other person involved is also human?
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Yes
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No
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Question of
Is it politically correct to change existing stories removing Gender Bias?
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Yes
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No
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Question of
Have you ever send a direct or private message letting someone know you loved their post or comments?
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Yes
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No
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You’ve touched so interesting problem!!! Always try to remember that people want to get some positive feedback. Also totally agree with you about so much negativity in Internet, why should I increase it if I can avoid it/create a constructive dialogue. By the way, because of that, I was able to meet many interesting people in Internet and exchange views with them on various issues. As for changing existing stories, it doesn’t seems to me that it’s correct. And, of course, Virily community is super, like the big family from all over the world!!!
I think the old stories and fairytales have been whitewashed enough and don’t need to be further mutilated by gender neutral pronouns. The romance languages aren’t really suited for PC anyway…
It is interesting, having been a DC area contractor for the past 7 years now, I can tell you that pendulum swings rapidly both ways. 🙂
Just saying that the old stories shouldn’t be changed, or if we are going to make changes then only to restore them to their original formatting
You want to insist on PC language for new textbooks and such? Fine, but hands off the classics…
That is the argument the twins and I have all the time. I am on your side, but they are pushing me towards the middle. I do see some value in reducing the sexism in the world overall.
Moving forward, sure. But I will never condone retroactive alteration
Still I must say that sometimes the politically correct answer is not the answer I want to give and I am happy to stand by the non-politically correct answer.
I agree, as long as that isn’t the only message you ever give that person. Currently, there is a lot of negative press about Virily. Some people complain all the time, but they are the first one that post the I got paid update.
Just want them to be fair.
i don’t know… i tried to be positive as much as I can, but is being honest negativity?
Honestly is only negativity is you only share one side. Then it is negativity. Honesty that is both sides shared is fair always.
that’s good. sometimes i want to say what I feel and type it. but most of the time I will think again before doing so because i am afraid to hurt someone’s feelings.
It can be very difficult. I always try to find something nice to say. Sometimes though, there is no nice. That is the hardest (and rarest) social situation. I worry that all the people getting paid here on virily (just watch the 25th of the month for all the I got paid posts) forget that payment is a validation of views, not something positive. IE if I say I got paid that is positive for me, not for Virily.
By the by, if you do count your negative versus positive comments and posts, take a moment and count them by each person you interact with. If you only post negative posts about another person or group how do you think they will respond to you?