One of the things I need to share from time to time is the reality of communication. I share the communications patterns and anti-patterns on the various blogs I write for. I am, have and continue to learn and improve my communication. I am nowhere near perfect. I wish I were, but I know that being perfect is difficult to attain and not realistic as a goal. I do however have and live by some simple rules.
- It is always ok to argue. If you disagree with me, I am happy to have the discussion. If however, we are unable to reach a consensus, it doesn’t mean I am disrespectful; it just means that we disagree.
- There are rules when you communicate online. Who is responsible for the rules? Everyone. It isn’t site owners, blog owners or the police that are responsible for enforcing the rules. If there are people that break the rules, everyone should work to enforce the rules. Rules help create fair, which is hard to do without rules.
- The most important lesson I’ve learned and rule I apply is way out with dignity. Rule 1, its ok to argue, rule two rules are important. Rule 3 is giving someone a way out of the situation without them feeling like they were at risk.
Look communication is painful. It is a situation that requires both understanding the other person’s position but also, standing for what you believe in. It is so hard to continue conversations sometimes when people don’t believe rules are critical when they don’t give you away out of the situation with dignity.
The three rules I’ve shared are stacked one upon the other. You can’t apply one and skip two (well I can’t). The reality for me is the three rules shared work together. They are how I communicate online and ultimately how I communicate as a person.
Sometimes it is important to remember there are no guaranteed right answers, but it is ok to defense the answer you believe is right!