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The Silly Crazy Laws in the US: Oklahoma

Every state in the US has its share of silly, crazy laws. Some states have more of them than others and Oklahoma fits as one of the states with a lot of absurd laws. To be fair, some of them actually make sense, though many do not.

* If you want to hunt whales, don’t go to Oklahoma. In Oklahoma, whaling is against the law. Maybe that is why there are so few whaling ships in Oklahoma? Of course, it could also be because there are no whales.

* In Oklahoma, it is against the law to transport fish on a public bus if they are in a fishbowl. If people want to do it, they’d best call a taxi.

* In Oklahoma, it is illegal to carry Kleenex or other facial tissue in the back of a car. Apparently, it is only legal if they are carried in the front of a car, such as in the glove box. I have no idea what prompted this law.

* In Oklahoma, it is against the law to have sex before marriage. While many of us might agree with this law, I can’t help but wonder just how many criminals there are in Oklahoma.

* In Oklahoma, oral sex is against the law. It is a misdemeanor that is punishable by up to a $2,500 fine and a year in jail.

* In Oklahoma, it is against the law for a woman to do her own hair unless she is licensed by the state.

* In Oklahoma, it is illegal for dogs to congregate in groups of three or more on private property without having a permit that is signed by the mayor. I wonder if they are worried that the dogs might be planning an overthrow of the government. With laws like these, I can understand that concern.

* In Oklahoma, it is illegal to read a comic book while operating a motor vehicle. And here I thought that texting and driving were dangerous! I’m not sure how common this practice was, but apparently enough to make the passage of a law necessary.

* In Oklahoma, the law stipulates that cars must be tethered outside of public buildings. It might just be me, but I’ve tethered a horse, but have never tethered a car. I have a mental image of a bunch of cars milling around aimlessly, going wherever they want to go, inside of a courthouse because they weren’t properly tethered outside.

* In Oklahoma, it is illegal to make ‘ugly faces’ at dogs. The punishment for such a violation includes both fines and jail time. I guess that it needs to be happy faces or none at all.

* In Oklahoma, it is illegal to wear your boots to bed. Again, I wonder just how common this must have been in order to pass such a law. I’m thinking that it would be rather uncomfortable for the perpetrator, in the first place.

* In Oklahoma, it is against the law for a bar owner to let anyone pretend to have sex with a buffalo in their establishment. That begs the question, is it legal to actually have sex with a buffalo in a bar, if you aren’t pretending?

* In Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, it is illegal to own a stink bomb. Mind you, this wouldn’t make it illegal to use one, you just can’t own it.

* In Clinton, Oklahoma, it is against the law to molest a car. My question is, exactly how do you molest a car?

* In Ada, Oklahoma, don’t you dare wear jerseys, jackets, caps, or other clothing of the New York Jets football team. Doing so is illegal. This one is especially silly since Oklahoma doesn’t have a pro football team. Why they singled out the Jets is anyone’s guess.

* In Bartlesville, Oklahoma, it is against the law to cause annoying vibrations within the city limits. One might wonder what the definition is of an annoying vibration. For that matter, sound is nothing but vibrations in the air and I’ve known a number of people who had annoying voices, so…

* In Yukon, Oklahoma, you must, by law, honk your horn when passing another vehicle. Talk about annoying sounds!

* According to the law in Schulter, Oklahoma, women may not gamble in the nude, in lingerie, or wrapped in a towel. I’m thinking that if women are so attired and are in a gambling establishment, they are already taking a big gamble.

* In Tulsa, Oklahoma, it is illegal to open a pop bottle without having the supervision of a licensed engineer. I didn’t even know that there were licensed pop bottle opener engineers. Perhaps there are merely a lot of unemployed ones.

* In Bartlesville, Oklahoma, it is illegal for a person to own more than two adult cats. This might not be the best place for a cat lover to live.

* In Oklahoma, people are taxed for the furniture and personal belongings in their home. I have no commentary on that one, though it strikes me that people have probably already been taxed for those items in more than one way.

Normally, I only share 12 crazy laws in each state. There are 21 here, only because there are so many silly laws in Oklahoma. In fact, I haven’t included all of them.

What do you think?

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Written by Rex Trulove

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