There Was No Love – part 26

I   stand and look at the sea, and remember when I was Jen Jen. Remember when I was young and silly and insanely in love.

His name was Neil Caruso.

He  matched my grid of perfect in those long ago years, and I would have done everything, anything for him.

I used to think about him all the time, I used to draw his picture, and cut and pasted my life to be near him.

I  can remember his laugh, how easy and happy it was, and his smile, how it lit a room.   I joined clubs to be near him, went to venues in the hopes of seeing him.

I learned he was dating Jinja Amatto.   I despised her.  I thought her rude and cold and foul mouthed, and because I didn’t like her, I missed all the signs that he did.

I learned of their actual relationship in the worst possible way.

I wanted to invite Neil to a dance and searched for him.  Unsuccessful, I turned to one of his friends, Pablo, and asked;  “Where’s Neil?”

“He ran off with Jinja…”

“Be serious…”  I said.

Pablo laughed, “I am, can you imagine they cut to run off and get married?”

“Married?Jinja?”

“Well he’s been dating her forever… so… you can’t be surprised.”

I was.