alibb
Although I wasn’t officially (or medically) diagnosed with depression, I was very unhappy for a long long time.
It started when I was in Polytechnic (about 17) whereby everything changed almost drastically. The whole schooling system is different from before and I was expected to become independent all of a sudden.
Not to mention that I have a hard time making friends due to my low self esteem that rooted from critical “culture” at home and that I was an introvert.
I was unhappy almost everyday during my 3 years in Polytechnic, ranging from poor grades to guilt from skipping classes. (Well, I am just too sad to go to school and having no friends just makes it worst)
I was also indulging in expensive entertainment (like karaoke, food and games) which eventually caused me to become very broke.
So when everything adds up, I just couldn’t take it but doesn’t know how to change it, so the cycle just keeps repeating.
Skip school >> guilty >>> indulge in entertainment to get away >>> broke >>> guilty of spending.
So, many would thought that the root of my problem was probably school, and that it would get better after that but they are so wrong. The problem continued after I graduated and got much worst.
I wasn’t able to get a job or stay in a job for long. My low self esteem was triggered almost everyday. I was constantly feeling “lousy” and that I wasn’t good enough… eventually I wasn’t able to work at all.
I was very unhappy and I mean so much that I would cry during bath and sometime cry myself to sleep. I started having nightmares quite regularly and start to hate myself much more. And because of this, I stop communicating with my friend or going out, I think that they’re all laughing at how much a failure I am.
Eventually I did got better (but not fully recovered) and I would share about that another time. 🙂
You are very brave to write about your inner private feelings.Smiling on the face, always after the sun comes
Improvement is always moving in the right directions.
There is a lot that has happened in your life. You need support try find a consultation that can help you sort your problems and will guide you for your future decision. A colleague of mine was facing many problems in her life, therefore she opted for phone consultations from http://www.martine-voyance.com/qui-suis-je/ , you can explore the online page and get the detailed information.
You have no idea how many people in this world are depressed and unhappy. You are v very brave to write about your inner private feelings. Waiting for the next chapter of your happy life! Kuddos and good for you! Smile, it could always be worse. 🙂
Hi Carol!
Thanks for the kind and encouraging words!
Yes, we all need to smile more!! 🙂 🙂 🙂
You are very welcome. It has been over a year now, hope you are smiling. 🙂
Thank you, always smiling when I see your beautiful flowers and sunsets 😀
Dropping by to share another smile with you. 🙂
Thank you Carol… a much needed smile, just in time to make my day better 🙂
Was just signing off….. have a great evening!
I wait for your next life story, my friend. Do you believe that for a dozen years from the beginning of my life, I am also very introverted, low self-esteem, stutter in speech, often sick and almost failed to finish my college, etc.?
Thanks, my friend.
I’m glad we’re all better now!!! 🙂
Yes, of course! There are many miracles if we dare to find ourselves from all the things that have ever assumed as the reason for our sufferings! May you always be happy, my friend!
Interesting Post Bro..