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#12 Wonderland cake

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I want to talk about something that's overwhelmed my life over the last decade, more than the magnificence of this Wonderland cake. 9 years ago, my best friend passed away in a bizarre accident and Over the last 9 years, I've been trying to overcome severe complex-PTSD from her death. PTSD doesn't only happen to war veterans, those subjected to sexual abuse or even those who were even present at the traumatic event. Up to just a few years ago, I'd get horrible flashbacks up to 3 times a day. The incident would re-enact as if it was happening that second and I'd start sweating profusely, crying or dissociate. The intense flashbacks eventually receded but were followed by nightmares every single night for years. I knew perfectly well she was dead, but the intrusive memories were relentless. I was mostly functional on the surface and definitely was not a dangerous person. I maintained friendships/relationships, well-respected jobs, excelled at uni, moved interstate etc. I rarely got angry at anyone or broke down in front of anyone. On the other hand, my c-PTSD got too much to handle, I didn't look after my body and my body suffered for years (that's a whole other story). Mental illness can happen to anyone and it can emerge in so many ways. My blog and cake business has helped a lot as I can express those complex thoughts through my detailed cakes. The love that I still have for my friendship is conveyed through the amount of effort I put into my cakes/recipes. With all of the amazing things I've gotten up to over the last decade, nothing will make up for her death. The least I can do is be open about my mental health journey so that I can hopefully help other people out there. Anyone experiencing mental illness or health issues do not have to suffer alone xo

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Written by Kristina

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