When one goes over an abusive relationship, minute by minute they pick up all the ‘clues’. They see how the Abuser proceeded so that the physical violence was planned.
It wasn’t that he hit her because she did… it was that he planned to hit her and used … as his reason.
Once that becomes clear, and the Ex-Victim can see the relationship as it was, and catch the clues, it is unlikely another will be entered.
And, just as unlikely they will destroy a perfectly good relationship by misinterpretation.
The dangers of both can not be over emphasised.
Unless one fully analyses an Abusive relationship so as to see the excuses, one might damage a future relationship by seeing things that aren’t there.