Similar to MY WAY are hurdles. Putting hurdles before every decision, action, so that it isn’t What is done or said, it is a kind of How.
This one demands that one inform of various aspects of an event before attending. If the aspects are not spelled out, begin/end, dress, menu, number of guests, etc. then attendance is not possible.
This is so annoying that one can’t be surprised that such a hurdle placer is not popular.
Along with this comes, no smoking/drinking/singing in the house or whatever other ‘rule’ which tends to make the subject cease to visit or remain in that house.
Everything has its rules, style, position in time, making even the simplest gesture difficult. So why bother? If you must call Maggie 30 minutes before arrival, why arrive?
If you can’t do this or that or the next thing in the presence of Paul, why should he be present?