The difference between the memory of real abuse and the insertion of a false memory of abuse is the reaction at the time of the abuse.
This analysis is key to understanding.
When the child does not want to go to grandpa, or refuses to go to church, it is clear there is ‘something’ there. Some reason why.
Even if the child never said what it was, the mere fact that the reaction happened, is proof that ‘something’ had happened.
When there never was a single tell, when the ‘victim’ seems oblivious to the abuse until attending a psycho-analyst, it is almost a given that this is a False Memory.
This requires deep personal introspection so as to clarify whether the memory is planted, or real.