There are children who abuse their parents. Often, this becomes evident when the ‘child’ is forty years old. By this time, the various ‘traps’ and ‘plots’ are standardised, and are only perplexing to an outsider.
Why would a forty four year old married father try to hurt his mother by telling her how she ‘beat him when he dropped the jelly jar’ at the age of three?
What is the point of even remembering this? Of having it in the front of his mind? The outsider (or therapist) can easily ascertain he is trying to create a backstory of abuse and is searching for bits and pieces to form into a whole.
The Outsider, hearing this ‘one off’ incident has sympathy/disdain for the parent; for why is s/he putting themselves in a position to even hear this?
The wise parent, having heard this whine before, realises what is happening, and makes him/herself unavailable.