It happened over 25 years ago and it is still vivid in my memory.
My wife and I had gone camping at a very beautiful place right on the Yellowbottom river, above Greenpeter Reservoir, outside of Sweethome, Oregon. As strange and unlikely as the names sound, the area is really stunning, and we were far enough upstream that there was seldom much traffic.
People were scarce, but wildlife wasn’t. One of the joys of camping there is that we never knew which animals we were going to see; from rabbits to deer to river otters. We couldn’t afford to go camping there often, because of the distance from home, but we always had fun when we did.
On that particular trip, we arrived in camp at mid-morning. By the time we’d set up camp, it was already getting hot, so we decided to go for a swim. I rolled the windows of the car down a couple inches, and my wife, who had been eating corn chips, put the bag in the front seat so the birds wouldn’t get to them.
The swimming hole was only about a hundred yards downstream, at a place where the river made a bend in the rocks. The water was quite deep and refreshingly cool, though it’s passage through the rocks warmed it up enough that it wasn’t actually cold.
We swam for a few hours, alternating between being in the water and climbing out to lay on the rocks to let the sun dry us off. It was really quite enjoyable. In time, though, my wife began to get hungry. Reluctantly, we walked back to camp.
I immediately headed for my fishing pole, but I was stopped by my wife who had walked to the car. “You have got to see this,” she said.
I walked over to the car and stared in amazement. A little golden-mantled ground squirrel was sitting on the dashboard, contentedly munching on a corn chip. The adorable little guy hopped down into the front seat, grabbed another corn chip out of the bag, and jumped back on to the dash to eat it. There was no doubt that it could see us, but it was totally unconcerned.
As cute as he was, and I certainly didn’t mind him eating one or two corn chips, I didn’t want him to get under the dash and rip up any of the wiring. Those razor sharp teeth can go through a wire pretty easily. So I got in the car to convince our uninvited guest to vacate the premises.
Did you know that it is rather difficult to get a squirrel to leave if it doesn’t want to go? When I got in the front seat, the wicked little beast jumped into the back seat. When I started to climb over into the back seat, it zipped under the seat and back into the front floorboards, causing me to basically stand on my head with my legs securely wedged under the steering column. By the time I got myself unstuck enough that I could look over my shoulder, I saw that the miniature hellion was back on the dash, happily eating another chip!
My mood wasn’t lightened any by the fact that my wife was by this time giggling nearly hysterically and was watching the whole exchange with more interest than a person would give to a blockbuster movie. She could have watched while eating corn chips, but of course, the devil rodent was eating those.
It felt like a week, though it was probably only about an hour and a half, before I finally convinced the blasted creature to leave, noting that it took a corn chip with it when it jumped out. I rolled up the windows tight and was finally able to get out of the car, rivers of sweat pouring down my face from the ordeal and feeling far hotter than I’d been before we went swimming.
I appreciated the fact that my wife was so nice as to fix us both a sandwich, though I was less than appreciative about her laughter every single time she looked at me. I held my cool, though, even when she asked, eyes twinkling, if I wanted any corn chips with my sandwich.
It took some time to cool down, literally, and I eventually did do some fishing, catching my limit. The ordeal with the totally inconsiderate animal was beginning to fade.
We had a wonderful meal, sat beside a crackling fire long after dark and finally went to bed.
I was in a much better mood the next day and even laughed about the determined little squirrel. We were planning on going back home that evening, so we gradually started packing things up and putting them into the car.
Naturally, without a thought, we left the car doors open while we loaded up the car, including when I went down to do a last bit of fishing. My wife even sat on the river bank behind me and watched as I again caught my limit. It was a great day and nothing was going to spoil my mood. Finally, with everything in the car and after policing the campsite, we headed out, taking our time and enjoying the sights and smells.
That was when I glanced in the rearview mirror and instantly slammed on my brakes. The demon squirrel from Hades was back, curled up in the rear window and taking a siesta!
I literally tossed the camping supplies out of the car to get to the wicked, vile creature, and it started pulling its little trick from the previous day, running to the front when I was in the back and running to the back when I got in the front. It didn’t seem the slightest bit concerned about my wife, possibly because she didn’t stop laughing,until tears were rolling down her face.
I finally got it out of the car by tempting it with most of what was left of the corn chips, and when it was out, I threw all the supplies back in, jumped in and floored it, spitting gravel as we gradually attained a suitable escape velocity. The last I saw of the squirrel, he was just sitting there, watching us leave in a cloud of dust, while contentedly munching on his chip.
Don’t get me wrong. I love squirrels and most critters. But that little demon pushed me to the limit.
Really amazing.I like this animal.
This one was, well, annoying.
I love this departure from your usual writing style to share this bit of humor from your personal life. I needed the laughs, but sorry they came at your expense.
Enough years have passed that I can laugh at it too. At the time, I had difficulty seeing the humor in it.
It does go to show that I’m not serious all the time, though.
It is hard to laugh when you have to match wits with a squirrel. The ground squirrels that attacked my garden and destroyed weren’t half as much fun as the ones that ate out of our hands and scampered around the beach.
That is so true. Determined squirrels are exceptionally hard to control, too.
Around here, our biggest garden pest is deer. I love watching them but *not* if they are in the garden. lol
Ours run away if they see me. Makes it hard to get their photos.
It isn’t uncommon for me to get within a few feet of a deer here and to have it just stand there looking at me. They are totally unconcerned about humans.
I wish your wife had a video of all that cause just to
VISION that I fell out of my chair laughing I would have
LOVE to see it in a video they some determined little things huh?
This one sure was! Interestingly, that was exactly the same campsite where we were visited by a little spotted skunk. At least the skunk had manners and didn’t bother us. We never did smell the skunk, either. That squirrel had a major attitude. He won the battle, too.
they can be notorious little creatures, I have some that
hangs around my place & they just LOVE to arouse my pit
they get in the trees & just run about KNOWING my pit is
watching them & is going nuts hoping one will fall.
Interestingly, about 6 years after this incident happened, I rescued a pair of very young golden-mantled ground squirrels. They didn’t even have teeth yet, they were cold, and the mother was long gone. They were trapped in a bathroom in a rest stop. They became pets and we had them for several years.
oh I bet that was a lot of fun to raise them up.
Yes, it was. They liked riding around in a shirt pocket. We even had a cat that was quite protective of them.
Such a cute little pest. 😀
Yes, and I can laugh about it…now. At the time, not so much.
Animals can be annoying, sometimes, but after a while, we realize that it is a part of their charm, too. 🙂
Well, I think that its lack of fear could have been from the fact that it sensed that I wasn’t going to hurt it. That is a good thing.
It’s always a good thing when animals feel we are their friends. When that feeling is true, of course. 🙂
Haha, that’s a great story. The picture of the squirrel is so cute. I do love squirrels, but they are certainly brave little creatures. He was definitely enjoying your corn chips!
He was, indeed. Thankfully, we didn’t need the chips since we always pack enough to last far longer than the camping trip, but still…
Lol, so funny. I just had to read this after seeingb’Hades’ in the title. I wonder does the little critter greet everyone like that.
Since the squirrel had such a lack of fear around us, I’m guessing that it had been around other people many times and it had probably been fed. For that reason, it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that it treated other campers the same way.
I don’t blame him, I would go after human food too. So much to choose from compared to out in the wilderness, lol. I was eating a bag of pistachios and thought of this little guy.
It wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest if he also liked pistachios. lol
I understand how you felt but this was amusing. Awww I think he would have made such a delightful pet. You could have taught him many tricks. lol Anyway, at least you got him out of the car. Now he just has to wait for the next campers.
It is one of the few times that I ever came home from a camping trip more tired than when I left. It wouldn’t have worked well, trying to keep him as a pet. We had a bunch of cats at the time that would have thought that we were meals-on-wheels, bringing them a snack.
I read a book by a naturalists who did try to keep an injured squirrel in his house as a pet while it healed and he studied it. As you can imagine, although he did enjoy the little fellow most of the time, he did have his trials. He advises strongly against keeping squirrels as pets.
Nice one. Enjoyed it thoroughly?
I’m glad that you liked it. At least it explains why we liked camping in that spot.
I really enjoyed this post! Yes, squirrels can be very determined to get to human food! I’m glad that you were able to get the squirrel to leave the car before you got home!
Yes, it took quite a bit of convincing, and in the end, the squirrel was still left with plenty of human food to eat.